Far Away!
When Richard , my colleague, asked me “ So what is it exactly that you miss about your country ?”,my mind was suddenly filled with images and events of relatives , friends, college, school, food, movies and an endless list got created in my mind. We were sitting at our desks on the computer in our posh office in London and chatting about ‘how so many Indians come to UK in search of better life’. I, as always, was explaining everyone about the differences in India and UK.
I always wondered what these British people must be thinking about we foreigners, invading their country, creating competition for jobs , building temples around, changing their taste buds to ‘curries’ and making their lifestyle more diverse , fast and colourful.
The’ Indianism’, as I have named it, is a fast growing culture spreading throughout the globe. Indians are opportunists and they have reached all the places in the world where there is opportunity to grow, learn, earn and prosper. They have strong foundation of religion, culture, values and moral of their society which they take it with them and retain it. They would rather influence the original society of that country than change themselves. This is such a powerful community that the enthusiasm, zeal and passion of these people have created a mini India outside India in all the major countries in the world. The Indianism never lets you forget who you are, where you are from .It has the power to carry it over many generations living outside India.
But every Indian living abroad, in spite of creating their own mini India around them, miss their home as much as a six year old will miss home when sent to a boarding school. After living for about more than a year in UK when I returned to India for my first vacation, more than the hot weather, I could feel the warmth and love of people protecting me. More than the pollution and dirt, I smelled the familiar sweet smell of the land. It was my land, a sense of belonging, homely feelings overpowered me. There were millions of people walking on the road, all of the same skin as me and powered by the same ‘Indianism’ that dwells within me.
It is very difficult to express what you miss about your country when you go away from it. I am what I am because of my upbringing, the culture that is embedded in me, the surroundings that I grew up in, the thoughts that are imparted in me by parents, friends and society. When I along with my set of thoughts and habits face a society that has completely different set of thoughts and culture, it is more about missing ‘being myself’ than anything else. We are so used to seeing people of our race and interact with them that when I first encountered British people, it was very hard to interpret their expressions, let aside the language. And then it’s not just people but the earth beneath your feet also takes a different look than what you know her from so many years. The trees and their leaves have a range of colours unknown to the tropical world and the weather changes its mood so often that it becomes a daily activity to check the forecast.
The extremes of weather from snowy -10 degrees to rainy cloudy and windy summers change your perception of nature and its relevance with so many festival and events that we have in India. Every aspect of your being alive is changed. Food, clothes, shelter take a different form pushing us to the core ability of all living beings- Adaptation.
But, the ‘Indianism’ remains alive within hearts, continuously reminding of our past, the comfort zone that we are used to for so many years and pushes us to change the surroundings we live in. All such like minded people gather together to create the associations and gathering of Indian groups. They meet, talk about India, share food, play, and create opportunities for entertainment through competitions and exhibitions.
It will be definitely wrong to say that the influence of Indianism is just positive. It comes with its own share of problems. There are Indianism struck areas in UK, which are getting dirtier with garbage lying around the streets, shops and houses. There are cars on the road with complete disrespect for the traffic laws . There are many illegal Indian immigrants working illegally in UK and also creating opportunities for those who want to enter UK illegally. It is almost a part of our nature to disobey the law or at least bend it in such a way that it suits us. There are habits and attitude of Indianism which are still struggling to improve and live up to their own image of true Indians. Sometimes I think this carefree attitude of Indianism is developed to such an extent due to huge population and a fierce competition to survive and succeed.
Unlike India, western countries are so less populated that they give a feeling of emptiness. Remote and loneliness is part of their lives. It is not a sorrow but they actually enjoy it. In the already less populated families, as soon as kids grow up to their adolescence they like to take control their lives and perhaps start living separate from their parents. Life is more concentrated around an individual, his career, dreams and success rather than the family life and sharing of happiness and success of everyone together as a team. I sometimes wonder, if human being is a social animal who likes to live in colonies then this behaviour of humans is taking them away from their basic nature.
But when I start enjoying this solitude ,this freedom, this cold weather or listen to UK top ten chart albums while eating ‘Fish and chips’, I know that time has started playing its role. Recently, I was so engrossed in watching Wimbledon and cheering for the UK tennis Player Andy Murry that I hardly remembered how much I hated sports back in India. Time has proved again and again that change is the only constant in universe. We all are built in with the ability to change and respond to new situations and eventually become happy in the changed situation. People who cannot achieve this fail in the test of survival. When I get bored of cooking same curries and chapatti, I try the new recipes of pasta and sandwiches or when I get bored of wearing same salwar kurta and jeans, I open my mind to new fashion of sweaters, tops and dresses. It’s only human to have curiosity and explore new areas of life. There is so much variety you can bring into your life, if you open your eyes, ears and most important your mind!
I always wondered what these British people must be thinking about we foreigners, invading their country, creating competition for jobs , building temples around, changing their taste buds to ‘curries’ and making their lifestyle more diverse , fast and colourful.
The’ Indianism’, as I have named it, is a fast growing culture spreading throughout the globe. Indians are opportunists and they have reached all the places in the world where there is opportunity to grow, learn, earn and prosper. They have strong foundation of religion, culture, values and moral of their society which they take it with them and retain it. They would rather influence the original society of that country than change themselves. This is such a powerful community that the enthusiasm, zeal and passion of these people have created a mini India outside India in all the major countries in the world. The Indianism never lets you forget who you are, where you are from .It has the power to carry it over many generations living outside India.
But every Indian living abroad, in spite of creating their own mini India around them, miss their home as much as a six year old will miss home when sent to a boarding school. After living for about more than a year in UK when I returned to India for my first vacation, more than the hot weather, I could feel the warmth and love of people protecting me. More than the pollution and dirt, I smelled the familiar sweet smell of the land. It was my land, a sense of belonging, homely feelings overpowered me. There were millions of people walking on the road, all of the same skin as me and powered by the same ‘Indianism’ that dwells within me.
It is very difficult to express what you miss about your country when you go away from it. I am what I am because of my upbringing, the culture that is embedded in me, the surroundings that I grew up in, the thoughts that are imparted in me by parents, friends and society. When I along with my set of thoughts and habits face a society that has completely different set of thoughts and culture, it is more about missing ‘being myself’ than anything else. We are so used to seeing people of our race and interact with them that when I first encountered British people, it was very hard to interpret their expressions, let aside the language. And then it’s not just people but the earth beneath your feet also takes a different look than what you know her from so many years. The trees and their leaves have a range of colours unknown to the tropical world and the weather changes its mood so often that it becomes a daily activity to check the forecast.
The extremes of weather from snowy -10 degrees to rainy cloudy and windy summers change your perception of nature and its relevance with so many festival and events that we have in India. Every aspect of your being alive is changed. Food, clothes, shelter take a different form pushing us to the core ability of all living beings- Adaptation.
But, the ‘Indianism’ remains alive within hearts, continuously reminding of our past, the comfort zone that we are used to for so many years and pushes us to change the surroundings we live in. All such like minded people gather together to create the associations and gathering of Indian groups. They meet, talk about India, share food, play, and create opportunities for entertainment through competitions and exhibitions.
It will be definitely wrong to say that the influence of Indianism is just positive. It comes with its own share of problems. There are Indianism struck areas in UK, which are getting dirtier with garbage lying around the streets, shops and houses. There are cars on the road with complete disrespect for the traffic laws . There are many illegal Indian immigrants working illegally in UK and also creating opportunities for those who want to enter UK illegally. It is almost a part of our nature to disobey the law or at least bend it in such a way that it suits us. There are habits and attitude of Indianism which are still struggling to improve and live up to their own image of true Indians. Sometimes I think this carefree attitude of Indianism is developed to such an extent due to huge population and a fierce competition to survive and succeed.
Unlike India, western countries are so less populated that they give a feeling of emptiness. Remote and loneliness is part of their lives. It is not a sorrow but they actually enjoy it. In the already less populated families, as soon as kids grow up to their adolescence they like to take control their lives and perhaps start living separate from their parents. Life is more concentrated around an individual, his career, dreams and success rather than the family life and sharing of happiness and success of everyone together as a team. I sometimes wonder, if human being is a social animal who likes to live in colonies then this behaviour of humans is taking them away from their basic nature.
But when I start enjoying this solitude ,this freedom, this cold weather or listen to UK top ten chart albums while eating ‘Fish and chips’, I know that time has started playing its role. Recently, I was so engrossed in watching Wimbledon and cheering for the UK tennis Player Andy Murry that I hardly remembered how much I hated sports back in India. Time has proved again and again that change is the only constant in universe. We all are built in with the ability to change and respond to new situations and eventually become happy in the changed situation. People who cannot achieve this fail in the test of survival. When I get bored of cooking same curries and chapatti, I try the new recipes of pasta and sandwiches or when I get bored of wearing same salwar kurta and jeans, I open my mind to new fashion of sweaters, tops and dresses. It’s only human to have curiosity and explore new areas of life. There is so much variety you can bring into your life, if you open your eyes, ears and most important your mind!
The option of adapting or going back to homeland is still a choice that one has. It is a debate between wealth Vs. comfort and stability; Freedom and new life Vs. family and friends; higher education and career opportunities Vs. Culture of India; higher standard of living Vs. pride of the home country. It is a debate between New Me Vs. Old Me.The dilemma is very intense. There are some very tough fights between thoughts and emotions. It is not easy to let go off our past nor is it easy to accept the future. Sometimes I am very upset, lonely and frustrated for not being with my family, not being part of their lives and other times, I want to live every moment of this new life and face all the new challenges that come my way. It requires courage, intelligence and adaptability to not just survive but excel in the world unknown to you. It is difficult but thrilling. Life is like a big jig-saw puzzle. As we take decisions and give direction to our life we get closer and closer to solving the puzzle. There are always missing pieces to keep us interested. It is we who decide how big the puzzle we want it to be. There is no right or wrong for any decision made. The puzzle just keeps getting bigger or smaller. I always wanted to live my life to the fullest and make it as big as I can. Make it full of new experiences and adventures. Travel to new places, understand and experience life from a new perspective. It makes me feel closer to nature, closer to world and closer to myself. It’s just a perspective to think that India is my country or UK is a foreign country. It is true that I originated from India and I am proud of it but I equally value the world we live in today. We all have come this far in the history of humans due to combined efforts of the whole world .You make the puzzle very small when you restrict yourself to just one part of the world. It is a blessing for humans that they can understand, explore and discover the world in a better way than the rest of the animals. I want to definitely take advantage of it. For me, the whole world is my big puzzle. And I want to solve it as much as I can! What about you?
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